This was my fifth time hiring a camper van to attend glastonbury. The destination will become relevant later.
So, where do I start with this debacle? I guess at the beginning. In my first contact about hiring the van I stated that myself and my two adult daughters were going to glastonbury and that we’d done it a number of times before and like to return The van in the condition we take it in. Stephen accepted the booking and stated no smoking in the van which was perfectly fine of course.
The weekend before collection on the Tuesday, I messaged twice to confirm a few things. The address, collection time, if there was somewhere I could chain my motorbike near the collection area and also the inventory that I would be taking with me. No reply at all. None.
I messaged on Monday to say that i’d be there at about 11am-12 noon to collect and was told that “Should be ok.”
I got to the van on Tuesday at 11:30 and Stephen wasn’t there. In fact, he was at work, working on other camper vans, so his wife told me. His wife, I should add was very pleasant. Having hired a number of vans before I’m quite familiar with how they operate of course. His wife showed me round the van and although it’s dated, it seemed to be sufficient. She wasn’t told he had filled the water tank so we tried to do that before finding out it was full and that he’d already filled it. The ONLY piece of “kitchen equipment” that we were given was a kettle. That was it. Nothing else. “Equipment” generally means plural, and the logo on the GoBoony website has a cooking pot as an icon. Not one cooking pot. No cutlery, no cups, no plates,nothing. Just a kettle. Ridiculous.
To be honest, i was extremely surprised Stephen wasn’t there, as obviously, it’s his van and he knows everything about it. His wife didn’t. She didn’t know how to get the gas on so that the cooking stoves could be lit. We tried for about 15-20 minutes to do it and no joy. I messaged Stephen asking him to call as a matter of urgency as we couldn’t get the gas on at all. After attempted calls from his wife to him, he eventually made it on to a FaceTime call with her and we got the stoves working. Moving valves, loosening the gas tank connection etc.
Next however was the fridge. It runs on gas and electric but at glastonbury there’s no Electric outlets to plug in to and you can’t take a generator. While on the FaceTime call Stephen asked where we were going. I told him we were going to Glastonbury and he then said “I don’t allow festivals” to which I replied “ I expressly stated in my initial enquiry via Goboony that I’d be going to Glastonbury with my daughters”. “Oh, OK then” was his reply. Back to the Fridge. Apparently there’s a “certain knack” to getting it turned on using the gas. Well, seeing as Stephen had apparently never shown his wife the “knack” and he himself wasn’t there, neither me nor his wife could get it turned on after numerous attempts over 10 minutes . “It does work” he assured me. I thought then that I’d be sure to get it turned on later when I had more time and we had set up at the festival. I was wrong. The fridge, with a combined total of well over an hour of attempts, did not come on at all. Infuriating and ridiculous. I had to turn the engine on the van on for a short while and during that half hour period the fridge did come on using the electric, because the van was running and it took power from the battery, but of course, it turned off immediately once I turned the engine off. So, no cold drinks or food we had taken for the entire period I had the van. i later had to throw our food out.
Other issues. Firstly, the van should have been cleaned but it was anything but. The shower and toilet were dirty. Hairs on the floor, dirt on the floor, not nice at all. No shower curtain in the shower area. I discovered on the Wednesday that the toilet cassette was full. The previous people who rented it had not emptied it and evidently neither stephen nor his wife had bothered to check. So, I was travelling in it with a toilet cassette full of other peoples piss and shit and had to empty it immediately. Disgusting. In general, not clean at all and how they rent it out like that is beyond me.
The main bed area with the sofas. There’s some pull out slats which make the sleeping area between the sofas and they rest on a kind of shelf bit on either side. Well, the bit on the right was broken, so of course, the slats fall down making it useless and impossible as a bed. I just happened to bring with me a very sturdy plastic box which I had to put under the slats as a support (on top of the rug which I had to fold) so that they didn’t fall through when my daughters slept there. Stephen did however kindly supply one of the thinnest pieces of ply board which was supposed to act as a support. It didn’t. What a joke.
The two large side window blinds didn’t stay down at all. Luckily, there was a plastic box of something or other (similar to a small drill bit box)in the van which I managed to hook onto one of the blind handles which held it down in place so we could close that blind for the morning sun. The other blind, I had to use the previously mentioned thin piece of ply board and put it on the handle of the other blind to hold that one down.
But, lets get back to when Stephen got really shitty with me. Later on in the evening that I collected it, I sent stephen a message asking a few more questions. Asking if the van has to be off and stationary for the fridge to work, how will I know for certain that the fridge is on, does the control panel water switch have to be on the whole time to have hot water. His wife had explained none of this to me. Also, none of the keys provided opened the side entrance door so we had to lock the door from inside and then exit through the drivers door. As I was a bit stressed and busy with packing to head to the festival, I simply couldn’t find the petrol cap for a while. I sent a message asking where it was and then shortly after I found it. When I asked “where’s the petrol cap”, the reply I got was “diesel” and then “push on it”. good. got that found and sorted. I then asked if he could answer my other questions (this was at 8:30pm, I’m about to head off).
“Van works on 12v when drinking but have to move the switch. You should have asked my wife this. Not my fault your in rush to get away when collecting van” I wasn’t happy that the owner wasn’t there to explain all this and he left it to his wife who didn’t know everything. Then….
“I’m not happy you put bike in drive. Was not discussed prior”.
I told him that I wasn’t in a rush, and that his wife said it was OK to chain it to his fence on his driveway and that I did suggest I would chain it to a lamp post (I’d asked the weekend prior where I could chain it anyway). She said at the time that it would be OK as he would park his car on the road as the camper van wouldn’t be there anyway. I also stated that she didn’t know how to get the gas on which is pretty important.
His next messages were:
“you told me you had to go when you were trying to light the fridge”. Yes I did, because I’d been there for well over an hour when it all should have taken no longer than 30 minutes.
His next message was:
“Can bring van back and get refund”. I then told him that I’d been there an hour already and it had never taken that long before when hiring a van to be shown everything.
Next message:
“So if you’ve rented before why do you need me to tell you where to put fuel?””It takes at least an hour if don’t know Motorhome””I’m happy to refund”
Not very nice to threaten my trip, by trying to cancel as I'm about to depart, eh? I explained that I couldn’t see the fuel cap straight away (it’s tiny, on the front left corner of the van). I explained that I’d never had to push light a fridge before so I needed to know how I’d be sure it was actually on.
Next message:
“Just bring back as not signed agreement”. Well, that wasn’t my fault either. His wife pulled up the documents on her phone and she couldn’t get them working for me to sign. She phoned him and told him about it at the time (this was before I took the van away) and as he was on speaker phone, I heard him say “just take screenshots and that will be fine”. She did that and then let me take the van, so all was good as far as I knew and she was happy for me to leave. Very nice that he tried to use his and his wife's error to cancel on me though.
“i’ve not had this in 2yrs rented van” he stated. I told him I couldn’t return it as I was now on the road. That I was asking simple questions to make sure it works, that was all. Seeing as his wife didn’t know, he was the only one who did know and of course, he didn’t bother to be there when I collected it which would have avoided all of this.
“I’d rather cancel” was the next message. “no agreement signed”, again, not my fault. I explained to him “your wife told me it was all done as I left her and I’ve already left home now so I can’t. I’ll be taking good care of it of course, just have to figure out the knack for the fridge is all”. So, he wanted to cancel my trip, at 8:30pm, 10 minutes before I was leaving, and have me drive it all the 21 miles to Eltham from NW London. What a fucking joke. And then? HE BLOCKED ME ON WHATSAPP AND IMESSAGE. arsehole.
I then messaged him as a normal SMS message on Wednesday (iMessage and WhatsApp not going through of course), trying to placate him a bit so he could help with the fridge. His mood did lighten somewhat but why should I placate him when I'm the customer?
He did reply in the end and helped me put the water heater on that his wife probably didn’t know how to do because she certainly didn’t explain it to me or even mention it. All she told me about was the water pump switch on the control panel, that was it, not how to actually get hot water from the solar panels. He did at one stage say “sorry it can be annoying” with regards to getting the fridge turned on. That was as apologetic as he got. Fucking scandalous considering the money I paid for his piece of shit van.
I happened to be an hour late returning the van due to a pet emergency at home and also an accident on the A406 on the way to return it, but all was left as I had taken it, actually cleaner, and I only did 360 miles. On the way to return it I did get another message from him “Van supposed to be back at 11am?”. I didn’t mean to be late of course, events out of my hands made me an hour late unfortunately.
So, in summary, the van is NOT worth what I had to pay for it (circa £1500). It didn’t come with all it should have done, no kitchen stuff, the toilet and shower area was dirty, the toilet cassette was FILLED WITH OTHER PEOPLES PISS AND SHIT AND NOT EMPTIED.
I only booked it as another van let me down two weeks before the festival. When you pick up a van you expect the person giving it to you to know EVERYTHING. His wife didn’t. Why the hell he wasn’t here to show me I’ve no idea. Fucking joke. The van also kicks out a lot of smoke as it’s old. Drives ok though I guess. Stephen is a miserable bastard who has no customer service skills at all. He caused me undue stress on the day of collection by not being there and later in the day when he wanted me to return it and cancel my booking. Yeah, like I’d be able to get a replacement within twenty minutes. Fucking prick.
I have every single message documented via GoBoony, WhatsApp and iMessage to prove everything I stated. Photos too.
The van ALMOST did what we wanted it to do, we slept in it, washed and cooked what food we had as soon as possible because the fridge didn’t work for us.
The main plus point from the hire of this “van” is that I never have to speak to that fucking arsehole Stephen again.
I really don’t care what he writes as a review about me, everything I’ve stated is 100% factual. I’m happy to post screenshots of all the messages between us so everyone can see his shitty attitude. I would strongly advise anyone thinking about hiring this van to NOT HIRE IT. For the same amount of money you’d get a much more modern one, better condition, CLEAN, that works, NOT FULL OF OTHER PEOPLES PISS AND SHIT and probably with someone to hire it from who isn’t an absolute fucking arsehole.
June 2023
Family
Diesel
Sleeps 6
6 Seats
with seatbelts
Rodrigo
Helter
